Nobel War Prize

Welcome to my life. Day 5779. Greetings my Morbid Marshmallows. Okay, so I've been sick at home for the past few days with some nasty bug and I've been watching a lot of daytime TV, including the news. Believe it or not, my favorite subject at school is Social Studies. It's like the one subject I always ace. Ms. Lipinsky and I get along, too. We share a lot of the same political views.

First of all, can I just say that we in America have no news reporting. Just check out BBC news one day if you want to see what real news reporting is like. We get maybe a quarter of the news the Brits get. What we have is a dozen cable channels all talking about one news item 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. For as long as they can milk it. Today they all latched on to Obama's Nobel Peace Prize like a bunch of pitbulls hanging from a rope.

Yes, like most teenagers I get most of my news from The Daily Show (which comes on three times a week). Jon Stewart is the only guy who makes the news even remotely entertaining. In fact, I'd say that's how Obama got elected - cause Democrats are so good at clowning the Republicans. They've basically succeeded in making them look like a bunch of rich, old, white, racist kooks with nicknames like 'Birthers', 'Deathers', 'Teabaggers'. Meanwhile Republicans are just really good at clowning themselves. It's hard to take them seriously with douches like Sarah Palin leading the fray. And all the Fox News guys (Republicans) are either like used car salesmen, talking real loud and fast and rudely interrupting all their guests when they hear something that might go against their way of thinking or they're like some nutty evangelists like that creepy Glenn Beck guy. What they need is a Daily Show of their own. Or at least a Weekly show. Just someone who can make fun of Democrats without yelling and waving around their teabags. What's happening is they're losing my generation pretty quick and that's putting their whole future in doubt. Obama is just the beginning.

My parents are both Republicans. They even voted for that zombie, McCain. Mom loves all those guys, even Bush. Except for Cheney. For some reason, he's the one guy that gets her goat. She actually spits on the floor every time she sees him on TV. Then she has to go and clean it up. Strange lady, my mom. Helen is a Republican too, of course. Me and Raymond are the only Democrats in the household.

Anyway, today all that anyone on the so-called news can talk about is Obama getting the Nobel Peace Prize. Now, let's face it. The nomination was made like a week into his presidency. So yes, it may have been a smidgen premature. Fox News is claiming that the international community is trying to pressure us. And yeah, they may have a point. And guess what, maybe the international community has a point.

To tell you the truth, I've never seen the difference between Saddam Hussein and George W. Bush. Both men invaded a sovereign nation for oil. One was executed for it, the other was re-elected. It seems to me that Obama got the Nobel Peace Prize just like he got the presidency - more for what he isn't than for what he is. And just like the presidency, it is something he has yet to earn. It's kind of a pay it forward sorta deal. The prize is symbolic. It represents not his achievements but the expectations of the world.


The Nobel Peace Prize has rarely been given as a 'lifetime achievement award'. It is probably the most important such award in the world, with publicity to match. The Nobel dudes know this full well and they never miss an opportunity to use it as some bully pulpit. It's like their one chance say their piece. Think Gorbachev - a communist leader who inadvertently ended communism in Germany and Russia. Think Al Gore - who made Global Warming a household word. And what about Rabin and Arafat? If that wasn't a pay it forward, then I don't know what could be. One of those guys was a terrorist leader! The only thing those two represented was the very hope for peace - however dim that light might have been. Let's just hope that Obama's pay it forward has a little more chance of actually getting paid back.

Whether or not you like Obama, you have to like what he represents, which is our system of government and free election actually working. He is the promise of Democracy. I sometimes wonder if one of the founding fathers ever looked on one of his slaves and wondered whether one of their descendants might one day rule this country they were starting. Maybe Jefferson. He was into that chocolate love. But yes! That was the original vision. A land where the people decide. We the people! And the guy we chose is in power. For this reason alone, we are now the envy of the entire corrupt planet. How many countries ever even get a chance to vote for someone like Obama? Someone not force fed upon them by the establishment? Someone who actually represents the people rather than some secret society? Very Few.

Obama talks the talk. He calls for a world without nukes. He welcomes talks with the Middle-East. He holds the promise of bringing the world together. Now the world wants him to know that he has been heard. And that now he is being watched. Barrack, it's time. Let's see you walk the walk.

So, yes, the question of whether Obama deserves the Nobel Peace Prize is a valid one. But it should be asked in about three years. Problem is, from all indications, I'd say he'll be more deserving of the Nobel War Prize. Keep sending our troops to fight useless wars, Prez. History is a cold, hard judge.